Winfree's Tantalizing Annie "Annie"
Ch.
Blueprint Winfree Party Waggin
x Ch. Ashwind's La Tea Da
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January 2009 |
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July and August 2008 |
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Annie's First Day in Her New Home |
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Annie’s Advice Column
Upon arriving in your new home, it's important to set up boundaries and establish your place as the head of the kennel. In doing this, it’s important to be firm with your humans. Give them jobs to do like providing dinner and water or brushing and combing you. It’s also good to allow them spaces of their own, like the very farthest end of the sofa in front of the TV. However, you may have problems with them that should not be tolerated, like when mine come into the room with my penned in, play area and start preparing their food. (It’s my room and not their “kitchen” as they keep calling it.) They have such nerve. What’s even worse, sometimes they cause me to wake up from my nap. What are they thinking about? I need my sleep. (This is as opposed to me waking them up at all hours of the night which is perfectly normal and proper.) I try to keep my humans on a schedule. I like my breakfast early, so I usually get them up before the sun comes up. After eating and having my morning water, they insist on taking me outside for a while. I have no idea why, so I just look up at them with a quizzical expression on my face as if to say, “Why are we out here?” Eventually, they give up and take me back to my bedroom (or crate as they call it) and go back to sleep. We usually repeat this going outdoors several times. It makes me so crazy that I have lost control of my functions outdoors which, for some reason, makes them incredibly happy. (Sadists!) Everyone knows that that’s why we have indoor floors. Speaking of sadistic, they took me to see a veterinarian who had all sorts of forms of torture. She and her puppies stuck needles in me and poured something in my nose and some foul tasting liquid down my throat. (As opposed to 'fowl', which I hear tastes pretty good.) The worst of it is that it was so unexpected. The vet and her puppies started out by worshipping me as they should. Then, “bam”, the torture began. Can you believe it? And, if that wasn’t bad enough, someone brought a mountain lion into the vet’s office. Well, maybe it wasn’t exactly a mountain lion, but it looked like one except it was gray and kind of striped. I would have bitten it, but I believe in interspecies peace. I was outside the other day and Gizmo, the white peekapoo, came by. We sniffed each other thoroughly, and then I climbed on his head. Remember, it is important to establish dominance, even with other dogs. Gizmo’s bigger than I am for now, but that didn’t stop me making sure he knew who is in charge. Soon I’ll be bigger than he is, and he will have to do my bidding. Saturday, my humans had some other humans over to eat with them. (I find this sharing of food to be strange, but humans are such odd creatures.) The older ones were very disrespectful. They barely petted and fawned over me (like only a few times for just a few minutes). However, the medium-sized humans, grand puppies I think, worshipped me properly by giving me the attention I am due. On Sunday, my humans disappeared for OVER TWO HOURS!! Who said they were allowed to leave? I had a present for them in the middle of my pen when they got back, and I don’t mean a chew toy. Finally, I highly recommend a list of priorities to follow each day. My list includes the following:
Now if I can only get them to stop carrying me outdoors. I keep showing them the places I want to use in the house, but they don’t seem to get it. I have to admit that it is fun when I use the lawn and they get so crazy happy. Humans are really strange ducks. (I hear duck tastes good, too.) However, I’m sure that I’ll get them properly trained eventually.
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